admin Posted on 1:52 am

Who dates younger men and why? The pumas revolution

One third of single women in their 40s and 60s are dating younger men, at least 8 years younger than them. As women have advanced financially and educationally, they no longer see themselves “stuck” in the traditional roles from which they have escaped. With the advent of birth control and Madison Avenue advertising moguls pushing sexuality in our faces to sell us some product or service, women are taking a look at other barriers that they can now address and tear down; specifically: age.

If a 24-year-old woman thought a 24-year-old was attractive, why wouldn’t she look at him the same way when she turns 40? Because in the past women tended to get carried away by the noses of the more social people of the time, they felt ashamed or “not allowed” to “go there” with their sexuality. They were expected to be loyal wives, great mothers, domestic engineers, and other socially acceptable roles. With rare exceptions, any sideways glance at a younger man who could have been her son was met with immediate dismissal and much guilt. Certain movies came out to challenge these erroneous beliefs: The Summer of ’42, The Graduate are just a couple. Let’s move on to today with TV shows like Desperate Housewives and the fact that women feel much more free and liberated when expressing their sensuality, they keep in shape by eating right and exercising, they rejuvenate their bodies with liposuction and breast implants and by God … men begin to respond. Now that you are in a position to choose from the group of men who lick your feet, who do you think you will choose?

The bloated, tired, besieged, beyond his best shlub or a hot-bodied young man with “staying power”? She is in her sexual prime, no longer tied to crying babies, and a man who stopped appreciating her a long time ago. A man for whom she stayed awake, but he did not do it in return. She can still turn it on, but wants to turn off the light to “do her duty” to him. Add to the mix the fact that if she was a starter wife, when her husband hits the mid-life crisis and swaps her out for the same model, only with less years and less mileage, she is left out. Well not yet. What is good for the goose is good for the goose. Turning around is fair game. And all those other cliches that happen to be true now apply in this case. As this movement to break the age between the sexes takes hold, it will eventually become just as palatable as older men dating and marrying younger women.

When a woman looks around at what is available in the market, she is quickly disappointed to realize that what is left out there with respect to men her age or older, are losers and mentally deficient, self-centered narcissists and men. who present themselves as victims of their past. spouses burdened with alimony, competing for the attention of the children they only see every other weekend, relegated to living in an apartment while the ex-wife gets the house and the new wife is lucky enough to get emotional crumbs, physical, mental or psychological. What do these guys really have to offer? It’s no wonder women see younger men as viable alternatives. There just isn’t much in the dating world that they want to meet in their own range. So women begin to reconsider their options. They go out with their girlfriends and attract the attention of the younger guys. At first this may seem strange and they may ignore it or think it is cute. But as time goes on and they realize that the men of their age range are not the Prince Charming they would hope to meet, the younger guys look better and better.

It’s no secret that women of all ages want that chemical oxytocin rush in their brains that they got when they were teenagers when they first fell in love. A younger man can provide that. With a younger man, a woman has the opportunity to reconnect with her sensual side and her sexuality. She doesn’t have to feel rushed to orgasm (faked or not) by an older guy whose stamina has passed by. And did I mention postcoital hugs? What could be better than snuggling with a younger, grateful man who adores her and doesn’t have a big, fat belly? (Sorry if I sound cruel here, but I’m just reporting what I hear from the women I’ve talked to on this topic.)

So, all you cubs who adore confident women … rejoice. The woman you want to spend time with may need to recover, but give her time and be yourself with her. Many women are still finding their way and may not be sure if this is for them or not, and the experience you have with your “first” puppy will help tell the story.

(c) Fayr Barkley, Ph.D.

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